Steelers’ 2009 Schedule Features Dicks, Pussies
By chris
The eagerly anticipated 2009 NFL season will kick off with the traditional Thursday night match-up featuring the defending Super Bowl champions. This year, that game will be your six time Lombardi Trophy winning Pittsburgh Steelers against the newly Albert Haynesworth-less Tennessee Titans. Not only will we get a chance to see old friend Chris Hope, we’ll also get a chance to present the Titans’ prized free agent pick up, WR Nate Washington, with the ring he barely kinda somewhat helped us win. It’ll also be a chance to meet up with infamous Terrible Towel stomper Lendale White and ask him how his little act of desecration worked out for him. Sooner or later people will learn that messing with the Towel only leads to bad things happening for you and your team. LenWhale should know, what with his horrid performance in the colossal choke job they turned in during the AFC Divisional Playoff game against the Baltimore Ravens.
Speaking of the Ratbirds, sources in the league have leaked the info that the big bad guys in purple have asked the NFL not to schedule either of their games against us in prime time. I guess getting whupped three times in one year is more than the poor wittle Wavens can bear and they don’t want their double humiliations this year broadcast to a nationwide audience. Gotta love Baltimore. They act so tough, thump their chests, and talk all kinds of trash about bounties and being the better team yet when it comes time to actually back up their actions, they whine and cower like a bunch of pussies.
Anyway, mark your calendars for September 10th. That will be the date when your beloved Black and Gold begin their march toward yet another glorious year. Man, that seems like so far away…