Fansided Divisional Smackdown Demands Your Attention

facebooktwitterreddit


With little more than a week until training camp begins, the Fansided network of blogs decided to try and get everybody in a football frame of mind.  So we’re running a little something called the Fansided Divisional Smackdown.  Basically, an All-Star team was chosen for each division and we’re asking the fans to vote on which unit is superior.  Using this process, we’ll theoretically determine the best division in the NFL.

DISCLAIMER:  I was on vacation when the AFC North team was chosen.

Very quickly, I am extremely embarrassed by some of the selections.   It’s a travesty.  A sham.  A mockery.   Clearly, there are still a ton of people jealous of the Pittsburgh Steelers. How else can you explain some of the perplexing choices?

Let’s see, Hines Ward as the third receiver.  Really?  Hines is a first ballot Hall of Famer.  Ochocinco is an overrated self-promoting media whore  whose never thrown a block in his life.  Oh, he catches the football?  Well, last year Hines had 1,167 receiving yards while Ochostinko had 1,047.   Guess some of my fellow bloggers bought this clown’s hype.

Shayne Graham as kicker?  I guess nobody heard Heinz Field is the hardest place to kick in the NFL.  Jeff Reed not only makes it look easy with his stunning accuracy, he’s one of the most clutch kickers in NFL history.

Shaun Rogers at nose tackle?  This one really upsets me.  Rogers is fat lazy piece of crap.  He takes plays off with regularity and the next time I see him hustle across the field to make a play, it’ll be the first.  Casey Hampton is a FIVE TIME Pro Bowler and almost universally accepted as the finest nose tackle in the game.  Except among my fellow AFC North bloggers evidently…

And finally, the biggest trashamockery of them all, Carson Palmer at QB?  Huh?  Last time I checked, Carson has no problem passing through airport metal detectors because he ain’t wearing any rings.   In fact, Palmer has appeared in all of two playoff games with zero wins.  Meanwhile, Ben Roethlisberger has nine wins and TWO SUPER BOWL VICTORIES.  You can’t even argue Palmer is better statistically since Ben had 26 TDs and 4,320 yards last season to Carson’s meager 21/3,094.   And we all know Palmer pads his stats with a lot of garbage time yardage while Ben’s stats are usually compiled in the midst of thrilling last second comebacks.

Whatever.  Haters gonna hate.  If you want to vote for the AFC North “All-Star” team (or do as I encourage you to do and vote for the AFC West out of spite) you can click here and make your voice heard. Do not let these injustices stand!