"Hey, Ben. Watch me throw the game. Get it? Throw the game! I like to throw a lot.." Courtesy Behindthesteelcurtain

Steelers Offensive Coordinator Has Head Firmly Up Pass

Bruce Arians needs to take off those sunglasses!  It is painfully obvious that they are interfering with his ability to see what’s going on just a few yards away from him on the football field.   Altitude induced blindness is the only acceptable excuse for the outrageously stupid, offensively offensive,  offensive game plan that ‘BA’ shat into action this past Sunday in Denver. 

I understand that the Pittsburgh Steelers crave a modern, metro sexual makeover (Ben’s hat).  It’s a quarterback driven league and QB’s love to pass.  It’s also plain to see that the Neanderthal concept, previously attached to pro football’s dark ages, of beating your opponent into submission via the run is alien to Arians.  Who wants to waste seven or eight minutes of clock time wearing down the other team with a rushing attack?  This is the age of ‘on demand’ and Twitter.  Things have to happen in an instant or they are empty and meaningless.  Hell, let’s score quickly, if at all, and get Denver’s offense back on the field so this kid can find his game and mature right before our eyes.  I guess Bruce Arians thinks it’s not fair to let Tim Tebow cool down in the second quarter while the Steelers mount an actual, clock sucking, momentum draining, DRIVE.  I am a pretty fair lip reader and I am sure I saw Screw Loose Bruce saying into his headset “That damn Tebow is as boring as Charlie Whitehurst if you just keep him on the bench.  I’m gonna see if I can speed this drive up”.

Isaac Redman was a beast Sunday vs. the Broncos.  He proved that ‘The Big Game’ is not too big for him.  Redman, wearing the number ‘33’, looked like the beautiful love child of Merril Hoge and Bam Morris.  Ike ran for 121 yards on 17 carries and still had something left in the tank thanks to John Clay spelling him.  Yet in the face of production like that, Arians still went empty backfield on 2nd and 7, 2nd and 6, and numerous first downs.  You want a wide open offense; I’m with you.  You want to play a predictably pass happy one, without even showing your opponent the possibility of a run; no thank you.  Keep a freaking running back in the backfield to help block on pass plays, or chip and release as a check down receiver, but for shit’s sake, Bruce, keep a running back on the field!  Arians has contributed to the extinction of the NFL full back and is now trying to make the running back a useless appendage (Ben’s hat) as well.  Wasn’t it just last season that the Steelers ownership stated firmly that they wanted to see a return to the run game?

I know that Bruce Arians is only human.  He can’t draw up a terrible offensive game plan and drop well thrown passes also.  But is he too arrogant(or blind) to tell when things are and aren’t working?   Drops by Wallace, Johnson, and Cotchery all killed drives and stopped the clock.

 Phil Simms must be equally blind; while BA was calling the worst game of his career (and that’s saying something), Simms mused that “With all the head coaching positions coming available in the NFL, that it’s odd that Bruce Arians doesn’t get courted” adding with zero irony: “Because he should be considered a good candidate” .  .  Phil’s name must be on that list of NFL players who filed suit against the league for not properly treating head injuries to say something that ridiculous.  I remember watching Phil Simms.  I know he has at least a rudimentary grasp of how professional tackle football is played.  You stick with what’s working.  The run was working.  This is not the ‘Run and Shoot’, the ‘Fun and Gun’, nor is it the ‘Greatest Show on Turf’.  It’s Steelers football.  Run the damn ball.

I’ll end with a terrible joke.

Waiter:  “Good morning Mr. Arians.  Would you like some common sense”?

Bruce Arians:  “No thanks.  I’ll pass”.

Next Steelers Game Full schedule »
Sunday, Oct 2626 Oct4:25Indianapolis ColtsBuy Tickets

comments powered by Disqus