These guys - bros.

Bro Bowl: Will Be Hard To Watch For Steelers And Any NFL Fan

Bro Bowl! Fans will have to experience (more like endure) a family feud that no one gives a crap about. Credit: Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sportss

Sunday was a tough pill to swallow for Steeler Nation and, quite frankly, the rest of NFL fans.

After a blown 17-0 lead, the Falcons folded to the 49’ers.  It was then that the whispers on Twitter began….

As the second half saw more and more of a Patriot implosion, Twitter saw more and more of an explosion of what Super Bowl Sunday would shape up to be.

Har-Bowl!          Super-Baugh!

:Gag:  Yes.  Somewhere in a dark corner as the final seconds ticked down on the AFC Championship game, Rodger Goodell, CBS, and ESPN were in a circle jerk over the two coaches in this year’s Super Bowl.  And why not?  Goodell couldn’t be happier that his poster child of the ‘reformed football player’ is now in a Super Bowl the same year he coincidentally decided to hang it up.  Stabby wasn’t all ‘pulpity’ until the latter part of his career and certainly not until that whole murder thing and settlement thing went away.  This humble humble man will certainly have his day in the spotlight…. again.

Artist’s rendering of what the Super Bowl will look like…

CBS will run this Har-Bowl BS until we are ready tie up Phil Simms and Jim Nantz and dump them into a volcano for a sacrificial cleansing.  Ok, we all want to do that already but this will probably take us over the edge.  The two weeks leading up to the Super Bowl are always a media frenzy of personal stories more than about the match ups fans should expect on game day.  By the time it’s all said and done, we will know so much about the Harbaugh family and all their fun loving quirkiness that we’ll feel inclined to RSVP to their next family reunion.  It’s a hellish nightmare and come Super Bowl Sunday, we may just realize that the Mayans were only 6 weeks off in their predictions.  From Boomer to Sharpe to Jim Brown, they’ll all have their say about these brothers and how special, unique, amazing it is for these two to be coaching against each other and how blessed we should feel.  I hope Cowher has a good lawyer because I don’t know how much he’ll be able to stomach before he takes that can of Skoal and shoves it up someone’s rear over all this talk about the Har-Boys.

And speaking of painful.  For those of us who choose to watch the game (I’m still on the fence myself), we will have to endure a painful ride of two grown men cry and whine on the sidelines, 1,000 Ray Lewis and Ed Reed sideline shots, allusions of Kaepernick to ‘the great ones’ before him, all while being dunked in a vat of Simms’isms.  Yes friends, it is the 9th circle of hell and it will be lead by two of the biggest douche bags in the NFL – the Harbaugh’s.

So, why the ‘Bro-Bowl’ as my suggestion of the appropriate title?  Try and think back to the last time you were out and saw two guys huddled together gawking over the ladies, laughing at fart jokes, and easily the two most egotistical dudes in the place – those would be ‘Bros’.  And that’s exactly what we’ll have two weeks from this past Sunday.  The ‘Bro-Bowl.’  I feel bad for guys like Kaepernick – who totally Tom Brad’ied Alex Smith.  Or ‘Niners Justin Smith who had to endure years of being part of the laughable Cincy Bungles but now has his day to be a champion.  Or even Torrey Smith of the Ravens who had to overcome real tragedy (not the courtroom type like his teammate) during the season when he lost his brother to a motorcycle accident.  Those guys and others will take back seats for the next two weeks as the ‘Bros’ take up all the spotlight.

Super Bowls have been criticized before for the teams that make it because fans don’t feel it will be exciting enough.  This game has the potential to be a great game and should draw a lot of attention simply because they have two of the best defenses in the league and a rookie QB who is having one hell of a run – now that’s destiny for you Ray Ray.  Too bad so many fans will be so sick of hearing about the ‘Bros’ (if not already) that they won’t care too much about the game.  Get the DVR ready and fast forward to get to those commercials.


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Tags: Pittsburgh Steelers Super Bowl XLVII

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