At 2-6, the Pittsburgh Steelers are finished. The “effort” put on display by numerous members of their team last weekend was garbage, and now this team is “circling the toilet bowl” with eight games left to play.
For you “21 and over” fans who would like to partake in our weekly drinking game, take a sip, swig, or even a hearty chug of your adult beverage if and when the following things listed below happen:
- Every time Ben Roethlisberger is sacked due to the play of their makeshift offensive lines.
- Every time “Big Ben” escapes a sack and makes a positive play down the field.
- Every time Antonio Brown pulls his bush league garbage of pointing the with the ball after a pedestrian first down. (Take a shot if a drop leads to a turnover.)
- Every time you wish that Pittsburgh’s brass drafted Eddie Lacy over Le’Veon Bell.
- Every time Brown calls for a fair catch on a punt return when there is not a defender within five yards of him.
- After every “three and out” by Pittsburgh’s offense. (Take a shot if they are inside their own 20 yard line)
- Whenever the offense turns the ball over. (Take a shot if it’s inside the opponent’s red zone)
- After every Shaun Suisham field goal attempt. (Take a shot if it is under 30 yards and the offense was bogged down in the red zone)
- Any time the defense gives up points in the final two minutes of each half. (Take a shot for each point allowed if you’d like.)
- Every time Buffalo converts a first down on a running play.
- Whenever you wonder why the offensive line-starved Steelers let go of Doug Legursky and Kraig Urbik.
- Every time a member of the secondary cannot haul in a pass which hits them in the hands.
- Every time Ryan Clark misses a tackle or takes a poor angle to the ball, ball-carrier, or opposing pass-catcher.
- Every time Buffalo’s right tackle Erik Pears stonewalls LaMarr Woodley in pass-protection.
- After every turnover-less and sack-less quarter put up by Pittsburgh’s defense.
- Whenever you remember that Jarvis Jones has less professional sacks under his belt (zero) than Subway commercials (one).
- Whenever you wish that Pittsburgh’s brass took Tyler Eifert, DeAndre Hopkins, or Alec Ogletree over Jones in April’s draft.
- Every time Mat McBriar boots a “junior varsity” punt like Zoltan Mesko. (Take a shot if it travels less than 40 yards.)
- Every time you wish that the coaching staff would play the rookies and bench the ineffective veterans.
- BONUS ROUND, POST-GAME PRESSER: Take a shot every time Mike Tomlin uses the word “obvious” or “obviously.”
As I say every week, those of you participating can amend the rules as you see fit, especially if you are looking to drink responsibly or the game itself is too close for comfort. The Steelers are coming off of one of their worst performances in recent memory, and this is probably one of the worst teams they have fielded in close to a decade. Thus, drinking heavily could come in handy for some of you.
So have fun today, be responsible, and try to stay as positive as possible that Pittsburgh will improve their record to 3-6.
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