Don’t judge.

I’ve finally managed to pull myself together enough to write about the Pittsburgh Steelers without having to blink back salty yet manly tears.  It’s time to lock memories of Super Bowl XLV in the same box as Super Bowl XXX and never speak of either again.  Rather let us turn our attention to next season.  Provided the greedy dickhead owners and high-living meathead jocks ever agree on a new collective bargaining agreement so we have a season.

Let’s start with the coaching staff.  Pittsburgh West Arizona wasted no time trying to poach yet more assistants from our staff.   Unfortunately for Ken Whisenhunt, the Steelers denied him permission to speak to LB coach Keith Butler.  Butler was given a new deal last season and word around town is he has been promised the defensive coordinator job when Dick LeBeau retires.   And if the Rooneys promise you something, take it to the bank and open an account.

So the Cards will have to settle for secondary coach Ray Horton, who is also interviewing with the Cowboys.   Maybe he can teach Whiz’s corners his fabulous technique of backpedaling at the snap so every receiver gets a nice comfy five yard cushion.  I sure hope this Butler guy is worth the hype when he eventually ascends to the top job.  Although that won’t be in the immediate future as LeBeau has told his men he is definitely returning for next season.

Which leaves us with Bruce Arians.  B.A.’s contract has also expired and he’s really done precious little to earn a new one.  People seem to have forgotten the stretch in the middle of the season where we scored two offensive touchdowns over three entire games.  In an ideal world, B.A. would be gone although the labor issues may prevent any changes.  If there is a lock out, it would be stupid to bring in a new offensive coordinator since they would have very little time to work with the players over the off-season.  Then again, the Steelers could promote from within since the plays aren’t really the problem but rather the Einey, Meany, Miney, Moe Method he uses to call them.

Roster-wise, Hines Ward (34), James Farrior (36), and Aaron Smith (34) are all reaching retirement age.   All three have said they plan on returning for one more go-round, with Ward scheduled to have multiple surgeries this week.  Hines and Farrior are not as effective as they used to be but aren’t at the stage where they embarrass themselves out there.  Smith is the question mark.  He’s due to make about $6 million this year which is way too much for a guy who gets hurt all the time.  Smith is a good man but the emergence of Ziggy Hood makes him kind of expendable.  I can see the Steelers asking him to renegotiate to a much smaller cap hit and, if he refuses, releasing him ala Joey Porter.

The Steelers have a list of free agents which I will get into when/if the free agency period ever begins.  Suffice it to say, the list is headed by LaMarr Woodley and Ike Taylor, both of whom we absolutely need to keep.   Woodley is a young stud linebacker who’ll be a fixture on the outside for years to come.  Taylor, whether you like him or not, is by far the Steelers best corner.  They’ve already started talking with Face Me Ike so I can see them signing one and Franchising the other.

Unless talks completely break down and Taylor leaves via free agency, I wouldn’t expect the Steelers to do anything except dumpster diving for free agents.  Paying high-priced mercs is just not their way.  So anybody dreaming of Nnamdi Asomugha in Black and Gold should just put those thoughts out of their head.  If he pulled a Bettis and told the team he’d play for a winner for a meager contract, maybe, but he’s not going to do that and the Steelers don’t have the cap room to pay him what he’s worth.

Would you let Woodley and Taylor go in exchange for Asomugha?   The Steelers wouldn’t but that is the choice you have if you’re in the Sign Nnamdi! camp.  For the sake of argument, let’s say you make that trade.  Then you still have B-Mac on the other side and instead of him getting targeted 15 times a game, he gets thrown at 20.  And you lose Mister Woodley in the process.  I love Asomugha as both a player and a character guy but it makes no sense.

If the salary cap returns (as expected) and the Steelers keep Woodley/Ike (as expected), that gives them very little wiggle room.  They may sign a few unloved veterans to either fortify the offensive line or play nickel but I wouldn’t expect any major roster additions to come through free agency.  Picking at the ass end of the draft, they’ll likely go Best Player Available which means I can see them taking anything from a corner to a young safety to groom behind Clark/Troy to another young defensive linemen (remember, Ziggy was our pick after our last Super Bowl).  We’ll examine both free agency and the draft in more depth in the days to come but suffice it to say, I don’t expect major help to come from either.

It’ll be more of the same from the Pittsburgh Steelers in 2011.  Can they rebound from arguably the most devastating loss in this core group’s history?  Can they stay healthy?  Can Big Ben stay away from drunk sluts?   They’ll be plenty of questions heading into the off-season but remember this group was good enough to still be playing when 30 other teams were sitting at home.  And that’s good enough for me.

Super Bowl XXX was the first time the Pittsburgh Steelers lost a championship game in their illustrious history.  Their opponents were the Dallas Cowboys.  Troy Aikman was the victorious quarterback.  The Steelers started off slow in that game but mounted a furious comeback that was ultimately undone by one too many mistakes.

Fifteen years later, the Steelers found themselves in Super Bowl XLV.  Ironically, it took place at Cowboys Stadium.  Troy Aikman was there calling the game.  And, once again, the Black and Gold staged a valiant comeback which was ultimately thwarted by too many miscues.

You can only dig so many holes.  Eventually, you run out of shovels.

The Steelers lived dangerously throughout this year’s playoffs.  Gave up a huge lead to Baltimore.  Ben Roethlisberger played lousy against the Jets.  Yet they found a way to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat.  Against the Green Bay Packers, they tempted fate once too often.

This performance was pretty much a Cliff’s Notes version of everything which had led to this point.  The Steelers went into halftime staring at a 21-10 deficit.  Ben made a handful of plays but played poorly overall.  The secondary, a question mark all season, broke down at inopportune times.  And if this game doesn’t signal the end of the Bruce Arians era, he must have pictures of Art Rooney II cross-dressing at a Lady Gaga concert or something.

I said in my game preview the Steelers would be well-served to emphasize the running game like they did against New York.  On their second possession of the game, Pittsburgh lined up with David Johnson at fullback and ran the ball down Green Bay’s throat.  Then, on 3rd and 1, Arians went with his beloved empty backfield and the pass fell incomplete.  They wouldn’t return to a consistent ground attack until the second half.

Backed up at their 7, Arians dialed up a deep bomb to Mike Wallace.  He was open but Ben’s arm was hit on release and the duck was picked by Nick Collins.  Collins returned it for a touchdown.  A few drives later, Ben tried to squeeze a pass to Wallace between two defenders.  Jarrett Bush snatched the ball away from Flash for the second costly turnover of the half.

Why were we throwing so much against what is generally considered the strength of the Packers defense?  WHO KNOWS.  Why does the rain in Spain fall mostly on the plain?  WHO KNOWS.  Do androids dream of electric sheep?  WHO KNOWS.

I’m taking nothing away from the Packers.  They played like the Super Bowl veterans while Aaron Rodgers earned a well-deserved MVP award.  This game could have been uglier than Fergie’s outfit during that debacle of a halftime show if not for the Packers young receivers repeatedly dropping his perfect passes.  So to say the Steelers beat themselves would not be fair because most of those drops would’ve went for long gains.

In a happier alternate reality, Wallace would have been the MVP after being left wide open time and time again by a badly banged up Green Bay secondary playing without Charles Woodson.  Ben’s throws were routinely off-line, missing a streaking Wallace on a sure touchdown early in the third quarter being perhaps the most egregious of his errors.  Every game has bounces that go one way or the other.  The outcome hinges on who makes the plays when they need to be made.  When the chips were down, Rodgers made the plays.  Ben did not.

Neither did Dick LeBeau‘s defense.  They didn’t play badly but they didn’t play particularly well either.  Troy Polmalu was a total non-factor.  They failed to generate a single turnover.  And they wilted toward the end of the game, surrendering a 31 yard pass to Greg Jennings and a 21 yarder to James Jones when they desperately needed to get off the field.  Granted, they eventually forced a field goal but by then the clock had been milked past the two minute warning while Green Bay’s lead had been upped to six points.

Despite all the errors, the proud Steelers did not go quietly right up to the final drive of the game.  Although the game really turned when they rediscovered the running game in the second half and it allowed them to cut the 11 point deficit to 4.  As the fourth quarter began, the Black and Gold had the momentum and were driving when Rashard Mendenhall was double-humped by Clay Matthews and Ryan Pickett and the ball popped loose.  A lot of football was left to be played but that ultimately proved to be one mistake too many.

Congratulations to the World Champion Green Bay Packers.  Also, a heartfelt thanks to the Pittsburgh Steelers.  Losing the Super Bowl sucks.  No way around it.  But when you consider the adversity they faced this season, from the unfair persecution of their starting quarterback, to the injuries to key personnel, to being targeted by a corrupt commissioner and being victimized by blatantly biased officiating, there really is no way to consider this year a failure regardless of how the journey ends.   So, thank you, Black and Gold, for playing with the heart of a champion even if you eventually fell short of that goal.

There’s always next year…

And so, the time has come at last…

For the past two weeks, you’ve no doubt heard an endless parade of “experts” analyze the match-up between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers from any number of angles.  From Ron Jaworski and his 172 hours of tape study to Shannon Sharpe mumbling something in his mush-mouth assassination of the English language, everybody has an opinion.  It’s paralysis of analysis to the nth degree.  When it comes time to determining the deciding factor in Super Bowl XLV, it comes down to one simple thing.

Slippery balls.

No, I’m not speaking of Ben Roethlisberger‘s unbreakable pair.  I’m referring to John Clayton’s assertion that Super Bowl balls are slippier than regular game balls because they have extra logos painted on them.  The Professor, you see, believes Aaron Rodgers‘ inexperience with gripping the special Super Bowl edition may lead to an unfortunate accident or two.  Makes sense as that tends to happen when squeezing strange and unfamiliar balls.

STEELERS DEFENSE vs. PACKERS OFFENSE

GM Ted Thompson looks like a genius for jettisoning Brett Favre in favor of Aaron Rodgers.  He’s the modern-day gunslinger without the phony drama, overpriced Wranglers, and pictures of his junk floating around the internet.  Rodgers has the rifle-arm and quick release to be a clear heir apparent to the Brady/Manning duo as best pure passing quarterback in the league.  Working without benefit of a running game, Rodgers was a one-man show most of the season and rose to the challenge time and time again.

When he was healthy that is.  See, the story the media has sadly missed out on because they were too busy analyzing videos of Big Ben singing “Piano Man” is that it is very likely Rodgers suffered a concussion in the NFC Championship game.  If you watched his performance, there was a clear drop off in his timing and accuracy after the helmet-to-helmet hit by Julius Peppers.  Being the man he is, and not a rifle-armed vagina like Jay Cutler, I have no doubt he told whatever lie he had to tell in order to stay in the game.

Rodgers has been concussed before.  Twice this season alone to be exact.  If he did indeed suffer a third in less than six months, well, I wouldn’t expect to see him at Mensa meetings during the off-season.  And Steeler Nation no doubt remembers how poorly Ben played post-motorcycle accident when it was whispered the head trauma left him in a perpetual fog.

James Harrison and LaMarr Woodley must hit Rodgers early and often.  I’m not advocating anything dirty nor would I expect anything of that nature seeing as the Steelers play a clean but hard-hitting brand of football everybody but the Ginger Dictator loves.   But the Steelers D have long boasted the reputation of the biggest baddest bullies on the block.  On Sunday, the bullies have to rough up that goofy looking beanpole at every opportunity.

Rookie running back James Starks is a nice story but the Steelers historically dominant run defense shut down All-Pro caliber backs with ease so if they run, he’ll be the bug and they’ll be the windshield.  The game comes down to Rodgers and his cadre of excellent receivers against Dick LeBeau‘s creative blitz schemes and suspect secondary.  One factor in Blitzburgh’s favor is the shaky line of the Pack.  They surrendered 38 sacks a year after giving up a league leading 51 and now play a team who can bring pressure from unexpected places.

On the flip side, this will be the best passing attack the Steelers have faced all year.  The Patriots have a great quarterback but sub-par receivers.  The Ravens have great receivers but a sub-par quarterback.  The Pack have great talent on both ends of the equation.  Donald Driver is the dependable veteran.  Greg Jennings is a big play threat.  Slot men James Jones and Jordy Nelson cause all kind of match-up problems in four-wide sets.

Bryant McFadden practiced this week and appears to be ready to play his regular role after seeing limited action in our previous two playoff games.  A nickel of him, Ike Taylor, and Willie Gay is much preferable to seeing Anthony Madison or Ryan Mundy out there.  Troy Polamalu also practiced a lot more than usual this week which is a positive sign he may return to being the sideline to sideline demon which won him Defensive Player of the Year.  In last year’s Steelers-Packers shootout, the defense got to Rodgers five times without bringing him down.   Convert those opportunities to sacks and I like our chances.

STEELERS OFFENSE vs. PACKERS DEFENSE

What more can be said about Ben Roethlisberger?  The man is simply the best big game quarterback in football.  His numbers haven’t been spectacular this post-season but he has an uncanny knack for making a play when one needs to be made.  There is a fire which burns inside him, an indomitable desire to win, which transcends any statistical measure of greatness.

He’s going to need every ounce of his legendary courage when facing a swarming defense coached by former Steelers defensive coordinator Dom Capers.  Capers has built a defense in Green Bay that is almost the mirror image of what we have here in Pittsburgh although their unit averages only 27 years of age.  NT B.J. Raji is a load in the middle much like our Big Snack.  OLB Clay Matthews is a relentless pass-rusher who can also drop back into coverage not unlike our Silverback.  Last year’s DPOY CB Charles Woodson is the rover, the piece who must be accounted for on every play because you never know where he’ll line up.  Doesn’t have the magnificent flowing locks, though.

Unlike the Steelers, the Packers strength would seem to be in the secondary.  In addition to Woodson, CB Tramon Williams is having a fantastic playoffs.  He’s the best cover corner on the team.  Rookie corner Sam Shields is the unit’s unsung hero, a speedster who can run with anybody.  Altogether, they make up the 5th best pass defense in football.

However, the unit is not without their weaknesses.  The outside linebackers opposite Matthews have combined for only three sacks.  Woodson, while crafty with a nose for the ball, no longer has elite speed at 34 years of age.  And while Raji has emerged in the playoffs, the Pack has been inconsistent against the run.  They finished 18th in run defense allowing 115 yards per game.

When the Steelers won their last Super Bowl, they did so without much of a running game.  Willie Parker was nearing the end of his usefulness as a featured back and the offensive line was mediocre at all positions.  Enter Rashard Mendenhall.  His performance in the AFC Championship game was a defining moment in his young career.

Maurkice Pouncey is a no-go for Sunday.  He gave it a shot but Mike Tomlin wasn’t happy with what he saw.  It’s a major blow without a doubt.   But remember Mendy rushed for almost all of his 100 first half yards with Doug Legursky at center two weeks ago.  Legursky is a natural center with a mauler mentality suited to running the ball.  Pouncey’s mobility in pass protection and ability to recognize defensive shifts and make the appropriate line calls cannot be replaced.  Their ability to run should not be as adversely affected.

Some people are predicting a shootout similar to the epic 2009 meeting.  With these two elite quarterbacks who can blame them?  While I believe the Steelers would be well-served to employ a ground and pound game plan similar to what they used against the Jets, Ben will have to air it out eventually.  That’s when things get interesting.  Hines Ward and Heath Miller have had better statistical seasons but they remain Ben’s go-to guys.   Mike Wallace has been quiet during the postseason although all it takes is isolating him on Woodson one time and he’s off to the races.  Then we have the rooks, Antonio Brown and Manny Sanders, who continue to impress on a weekly basis and have seemingly saved their best football for the biggest games of the year.

Despite the good-natured ribbing between Pittsburgh and Green Bay these past couple weeks, I believe there is a genuine respect between both teams and both fanbases.  And why shouldn’t there be?  This is truly a clash of the titans.  Number two overall defense versus number five.  Best big game quarterback in the league versus brightest up-and-coming young quarterback.  Terrible Towels versus Cheeseheads.  The City of Champions versus Titletown USA.

To quote a certain maniacal clown from The Dark Knight Returns, “And here we go…”

It’s ironic that the biggest “scandal” of Super Bowl XLV has been Ben Roethlisberger singing karaoke at a piano bar.  I put “scandal” in quotes because only a humongous tool would think Big Ben did anything wrong by enjoying a night out with his teammates.  And I say ironic because music seems to be Steeler Nation‘s second favorite pastime after watching the Pittsburgh Steelers. Every day for the past two weeks, my inbox has been deluged with odes to the most decorated franchise in NFL history.

Of course, the most popular is Pittsburgh native Wiz Khalifa‘s “Black and Yellow.”  I’m not really much of a rap/hip-hop fan but if someone petitioned Mayor Raven SteelersStahl to make that the city’s official anthem, I’d sign up.  I dare any proud yinzer (or ex-yinzer) to watch that video and not swell (or swool as the rappers say) with hometown pride.  To show the power of Steeler Nation, the single has been certified Double Platinum (ie: two million units sold) and currently sits at #3 on Billboard’s top 100.  I know I have a nationwide readership so those of you around the country, please call or email your favorite radio station requesting that song so we can take over the airwaves like we take over opposing teams’ stadiums.

The Green Bay Packers have struck back with a song by Lil Wayne called “Green and Yellow.”  This is hilarious because, for one, Lil Wayne is from New Orleans.  He’s not from Green Bay nor has he probably ever been to Green Bay.  I can’t really blame them for seeking outside help since, let’s face it, tipping over cows during the dead of night passes for “creativity” in Wisconsin.

Anyway, I’ve been deluged with Steelers Fight Songs, so I decided to devote a post toward the end of the week to them.  Personally, I’m happy with “Renegade” but I’m a huge fan of 80s hair bands.  Leave a comment on which one(s) you like the best.  Hopefully some of these get you FIRED UP!

Since this is a fairly long post, click the Continue Reading button to jump to the videos.
(more…)

Actually, it was a Captain and Diet Coke.

Video of Ben Roethlisberger singing karaoke at a piano bar surfaced on rumor-mongering website TMZ yesterday.  Naturally, this became the lead story on SportsCenter and every other sports talk show on the planet.  I didn’t want to dignify this story by paying it any more attention than it deserved (which is none), especially since Pittsburgh Steelers beat writer Ed Bouchette did a pretty thorough job of eviscerating it in this morning’s P-G. However, since everybody from Ben to Mike Tomlin was asked about it, I felt I had to at least mention this laugh-out-loud stupid story here.

He was singing Billy Joel’s “Piano Man.”

The only negative thing about the story to me is the part about him tipping $200 on an $800 tab.  A few bar wenches down on the South Side were probably stewing when they heard that.  Not that I have any problem with Ben stiffing bartenders or waitresses on a tip.   I don’t tip because society says I have to.  All right, if someone deserves a tip, if they really put forth an effort, I’ll give them a little something extra.  But tipping automatically or leaving an enormous tip just because everybody knows you make millions a dollars of year playing football, screw that.

He was singing Billy Joel’s “Piano Man.”

I’m sorry I keep coming back to that but could he have picked a more bland non-threatening singer and song?  My parents listen to Billy Joel.  I could see if they caught him doing “Candy Shop” by Fitty.  Or “Sexyback” by Timberlake.  Maybe he should have dedicated a rendition of Jay-Z’s “99 Problems” to his friends down in Milledgeville.

I am honestly disgusted the media has tried making this into a story.  Than again, TMZ “reporters” make their living picking through garbage looking for used condoms outside Charlie Sheen’s house so I guess we should expect it from them.  I only wish reputable outlets like ESPN or the major newspapers wouldn’t give them the attention they crave.  He went to a piano bar.  Where is the video of Hines Ward making it rain at a strip club?

I could see if he was falling down drunk.  Which he wasn’t.  I could see if he missed curfew.  Which he didn’t.   The hotel keycards automatically lock the doors at one a.m. so unless he and two or three three hundred pound linemen climbed up a fire escape and through a second story window, they were all back within the allotted time.

When the Super Bowl hoopla began, I knew Ben would be the big story all week.  However, the level of media scrutiny and unfair persecution he’s suffered from ignorant fools makes me root for him all the more.  Not only do I hope he plays well on Sunday, I hope he wins the MVP.  And afterward, he should thank God, his family, his teammates, and Steeler Nation.   Then give the middle finger to all the bastards who have tried unsuccessfully to bring him down.