Why I'm Glad I Didn't Go To Notre Dame

If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, the Pittsburgh Steelers will be blushing when they face the Carolina Panthers.  What?  Know Thy Enemy on Thursday?  Must be an NFL Network special event for those of us in the Steel City and the five other places which get that channel!

Anyway, Panthers owner Jerry Richardson has long admired Dan Rooney and his attempts at molding the Kitty Kats in the Black and Gold’s image go as far back as when they hired our defensive coordinator, Dom Capers, as the franchise’s first head coach.  Current coach John Fox was a secondary coach for both the Steelers and Pitt so you see the pattern continuing to this day.  In fact, if Richardson wasn’t such a cheapskate, I’m pretty sure Bill Cowher would have been more than happy to take over when Fox is shown the door after the season.

This has been a rough season for the first expansion franchise of the modern era to reach the Super Bowl.  The Panthers let some key personnel go after last season, resulting in a 2-12 record and massive rebuilding project for their next coach.  The low point of the Steelers miserable season last year was definitely the Thursday debacle against the Cleveland Browns.  However, this year’s squad seems to have learned their lessons, taking no games for granted and winning the games they should win.

STEELERS DEFENSE vs. PANTHERS OFFENSE

Carolina’s primary offensive weapons are in the running game.  Jonathan Stewart and second year man Mike Goodson make for a potent ground attack.  When the Panthers, currently ranked dead last in total offense, manage any sort of threat, it’s usually due to their running backs.  That’s the good news.

Good because the Steelers continue to put up some historic numbers in run defense.  They’re average per game rose by two yards after last week.  However, the #2 ranked team rose by five which means Blitzburgh’s average is a whopping 26 yards per game less than the next best unit.  Absolutely astounding.

If the Panthers can’t run, and the outlook is hardly positive, the game will be put in the hands of rookie QB Jimmy Clausen.  If the NFL is a quarterback driven league, the Panthers have a Volvo sitting in the garage.  Clausen has 1300 yards to his credit but only 2 touchdown passes against 7 interceptions.  It appears Jimmy won’t figure into Carolina’s future plans as the Andrew Luck Watch seems to be in full effect down in Charlotte.

The Steelers will be playing without Troy Polmalu for the second straight game. Troy has said he’s feeling much better and he very well may be on the field for the season finale against Cleveland.  I don’t believe in taking any opponent lightly but I have to agree with the idea of resting him for another week.  The defense didn’t play terribly against the Jets, they just didn’t get that one big play Troy always seems to provide.

If Ike Taylor can’t keep a lid on Steve Smith while guys like James Harrison or Lawrence Timmons make a couple plays against Clausen and that inept offense, they’re not as good as we think they are.

STEELERS OFFENSE vs. PANTHERS DEFENSE

Emotional leader Jon Beason has moved from MLB to OLB to replace Thomas Davis as Penn Stater Dan Conner went to the middle until he was lost for the season.  The Panthers lost even more pass rush when they allowed Julius Peppers to escape to the Bears during the off-season.  Although his replacement, fourth year pro Charles Johnson, has registered 9.5 sacks.  Despite Johnson’s solid play, the team is still in the bottom third of the league in total sacks.

Last week, our much maligned offensive line kept Ben relatively clean in the face of the Jets hellacious blitz packages.  There may be another change as Trai Essex is rumored to be taking over at LT for human pylon Jonathan Scott.  Scott was the bozo whose blocking “technique” of falling flat on his face led to the crucial safety late in the game.  He’s been various shades of awful since taking over for Max Starks so a switch to Essex would be more than justified.

The Panthers actually have a fairly decent defense, 12th overall in total yardage.  If there is a strength, it’s their secondary.  Perhaps their biggest playmaker is safety Charles Godfrey, who has five picks this year.  Corners Richard Marshall and the awesomely named Captain Munnerlyn have three each for what is the eighth best pass defense in the league.  Their weakness is in run defense, where they’ve replaced three of last year’s starting front four leading to a bottom ten standing and over 126 yards per game given up.

Heath Miller has been cleared of all concussion related symptoms so he should be good to go.  I’m sure Ben Roethlisberger will be happy to have his safety blanket back.  Emmanuel Sanders had a bit of a break out game last week so in addition to Hines and Mike Wallace, we should have all hands on deck.  Despite my analysis above, we may need to throw more than the match-up would dictate because Rashard Mendenhall tweaked his shoulder against the Jets which probably explains why Mewelde Moore got that ill-fated draw in the end zone instead of Mendy.

Of course, I prefer my explanation:  Bruce Arians is a dumbass.

The Steelers are pretty much where you want to be this time of year.  Sure, it would be nice to have everything clinched but the Colts have done that how many times with nothing to show for it?  We have our destiny in our hands.  Win out and the second seed and first round bye are ours no matter what anybody else does.  Not much more you could ask for than that.

Despite not scoring a single offensive touchdown, the Pittsburgh Steelers cruised to an easy 23-7 victory over the hapless Cincinnati Bengals yesterday.  It was far from a pretty, at least offensively speaking, but this Steeler team has clearly learned from last year’s mistakes.  They find a way to win the games they should win instead of playing to level of their competition.

Although when it comes to the Bungles, it’s almost impossible to play that low.

Cincy scored on their opening drive which would be their one and only fleeting moment of competence.  And even that was tainted by massive assistance from a clearly biased officiating crew.  Had they not been gifted 20 yards and a spot on the 1 yard line thanks to a ridiculous pass interference penalty against Ike Taylor, the Bungles wouldn’t have crossed mid-field until late in the fourth quarter.  The only question was how long the Steelers sputtering offense would allow them to hang around before putting the game away.

Ben Roethlisberger is made of iron.  Or steel.  Or adamantium.  Whatever your super-strong metal of choice.  I don’t think even Ivan Drago could break him.

Big Ben took the kind of beating usually reserved for pinatas or Tom Cable’s ex-wives.  Cincy’s four sacks don’t begin to convey the number of hits this man absorbed, most of which were so very very late I could time them with an hourglass.  The amount of filthy and illegal shenanigans the Bengals got away with was absolutely disgraceful.  The Steelers got so fed up a mini-battle royal erupted after the game.  Although nobody was victimized more than Big Ben.  Following one sack, a cowardly Bengal attempted to knee his broken nose.  Later, another sacker fell on his broken-sprained ankle.  On just a single play, Ben was smacked upside the helmet (again), then horsecollared (again) when he escaped to discover not a single flag from the refs (again).

To prove they did indeed have yellow hankies in their pockets, the officials threw them quite often on the Steelers offensive line.  LT Jonathan Scott is now the 2nd most penalized linemen in the NFL.  Unfortunately, most of these flags are justified.  Even though I did appreciate Steeler Nation greeting the officials with a “Refs, You Suck!” chant.  That began shortly after two consecutive holding penalties turned a 1st and 10 at midfield into a 1st and 30 deep in our own end.

Naturally, the Bungles are who we thought they were and a leaping 29 yard snag by Hines Ward got us off the hook.  Hines had a fantastic game, catching 8 balls for 115 yards.  Guess local windbag Mark Madden will have to postpone his next “Hines is nearing the end!” rant for a couple weeks.  Mike Wallace (5/78) also made a nice catch later in the game although the highlight reel play was Antwaan Randle-El’s brilliant one-handed stab to set up the Steelers first FG.

Rashard Mendenhall redeemed himself for last week’s cowardly performance.  Although he finished with only 66 yards, they were tough yards.  As with Ben, the O-line did him no favors.  Instead of finding a hole, he just had to put his head down and plow forward.  Isaac Redman only had 1 carry which is kinda ridiculous since I don’t care how young or in shape Mendy is, he’s going to be a beaten-up shell unless they start splitting some of his workload.

Ben and Rashard combined on one of the best screen passes you’ll ever see.  It started as a flea-flicker, which was quickly blown up by a Bengal in the backfield.  Ben somehow managed to shot-put the ball back to Mendy, who took it 9 yards.  I understand trying to manufacture offense but as usual B.A. does it in the dumbest way possible.  He actually called a Dennis Dixon play with Banged-up Ben under center.

Seriously, who the hell calls a QB Draw with a guy who has a broken-sprained foot and surgically reconstructed snoot?   Bruce Arians, that’s who.

One coach who had a good day was Dick LeBeau.  Games like yesterday’s are exactly why I have little tolerance for armchair coaches who criticize him for “not making adjustments” or claim “the game has passed him by” or whatever nonsense.  LeBeau is the not only the best defensive mind in football, he may very well be the best D-coordinator ever.  If there is a breakdown, it’s because the players either aren’t talented enough or screw up an assignment.  With Arians or Mike Tomlin, it is fair to question their decisions.

In LeBeau We Trust.

The defense played absolutely lights-out, forcing three turnovers while holding Cincy under 200 yards of total offense.  As I predicted in Know Thy Enemy, they switched Ike to T.O. which allowed Ochocinco to have his best game against the Steelers in forever.  However, neither Tweedledumb nor Tweedledumber were much of threat with a complete lack of running game (34 total yards!) and inept QB play holding them back.  Oh, Carson Palmer, how far you have fallen.

Funny thing was, Troy Polamalu narrowly missed an interception by jumping a route early in the game.  So on THE VERY NEXT DRIVE they run the exact same play and this time Troy gets the Pick-Six.  Soaring into the end zone on a wing and a prayer wasn’t exactly the best move for Troy’s gimpy ankle but given our lousy offense, I don’t blame him.  Early in the fourth quarter, LaMarr Woodley also jumped a route for an almost identical looking Pick-Six.  Then to close out the game, Troy picked off his former USC roommate one last time as a farewell present.

On the attempted run-back, or in this case limp-back, Troy looked around for somebody to lateral to.  He spotted Bryant McFadden by himself about half way across the field and launched a silly pass to him which B-Mac was luckily able to fall on before disaster ensued.  Despite being up 16 with the game sealed, LeBeau, channeling Clint Eastwood in “Gran Torino,” grabbed Troy by the shoulder pads and gave him an earful.  Again, how many coaches would chew out any player, let alone the team’s biggest star, after they basically win the game for you?   That’s Dick LeBeau and that’s why the players call him Coach Dad (He did give him a hug a few moments later.  Troy is a sensitive young man.).

Shaun Suisham continued to be the Anti-Skippy, steady and dependable with 85% less peroxide.  Good thing since he has been our most consistent weapon as the Steelers have now scored two offensive TDs in three games.  Don’t buy any of this stupidity about the Bengwads D playing a good game.  The line is a complete mess with Ben getting harassed and/or smashed every time he drops back and precious little running room for Mendy.  And now the Jets come to town!

Buckle up your chin strap, Big Ben.  It’s going to be another looooong afternoon.

You gotta hand it to Bill Belichick.   Don’t get me wrong, I can’t stand the MILF-chasing, sneaky videotaping (thankfully, those hobbies don’t overlap) stone face.  But you have to appreciate his ability to spin straw into gold.  This is actually a rebuilding year for the New England Patriots as they attempt to inject fresh talent in to a team which has only a few remnants remaining from the glory teams of the past decade.   And, yet, they don’t seem to miss a beat, winning the AFC East last season and posting a 6-2 record thus far in 2010.

STEELERS DEFENSE vs. PATRIOTS OFFENSE

Coming off knee surgery, Tom Brady took a while to get back into the swing of things last season but rebounded to post one of his usual fantastic stat lines.   This year, not even his ridiculous Bieber-hair has interfered with his ability to get the ball where it needs to go.  A 14/4 TD-INT ratio puts to rest any worries that Tom Terrific is slowing down.   One concern, however, is a sprained foot which kept him out of practice this week.   Not that Brady has ever been mistaken for a Slash but the ability to slide around the pocket to buy the extra second or two may be something to look for when he faces the Pittsburgh Steelers hellacious pass rush.

WR Wes Welker, coming off a serious knee injury, remains one of the best slot receivers in the league.  Although without Randy Moss stretching the field and keeping the defense from clogging the middle, Welker’s numbers have declined sharply (36, 24, and 25 yards in the past three games).  Part of the slack is expected to be picked up by the returning Deon Branch and second year player Brandon Tate.  Although the Pats best receiving threats have been rookie TEs Aaron Hernandez and Woodland Hills alum Rob Gronkowski.

Shockingly, the Patriots actually rank higher in rushing offense (15th) than passing (17th).  The running back position is a motley crew of misfits.  Oft-injured Laurence Maroney has been shipped out of town in favor of a two-headed monster consisting of Benjarvis Green-Ellis and little Danny Woodhead.   If you watched HBO’s fantastic Hard Knocks this year, you’ll remember Woody as a Rex Ryan favorite.  The 5’8 195 runt has become a New England cult hero because he embodies all the qualities Massholes hold dear (ie:  He’s white).

Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Belichick takes a page from his own book and comes out throwing the ball 35 consecutive times like he did in a memorable Monday Night game many years back.  The Browns held them under 70 rushing yards last week while the Steelers remain the top ranked rushing D.  On the flip side, our pass defense continues to slide down the standings on a weekly basis.  Gay covering Welkah or B-Mac giving one of his patented 8 yard cushions to Branch is the stuff nightmares are made of.

STEELERS OFFENSE vs. PATRIOTS DEFENSE

Remember all that nice stuff I said about Billy boy in my introduction?  Well, despite my puke-inducing praise, one fact remains.  The current Patriots defense is garbage.  GARBAGE.

They’re 29th in total yards allowed, 29th in passing yards per game, and 21st in rushing yards per game.  We should’ve seen this coming after the Ravens absolutely humiliated them 33-14 in last year’s playoffs.   But the point was more than driven home last week when Browns RB Peyton Hillis gashed them for 184 yards while Colt McCoy directed a steady attack without throwing a single interception.  Belichick is reloading the defense but it’s very much still a work in progress.

The fly in the Steelers’ ointment is half the team is in desperate need of Tiger Balm.  The offense was decimated by injuries last week.   Heath Miller is battling a gimpy knee.   Mewelde Moore and Issac Redman were both concussed last week but have been cleared by team doctors.  Of course, one bell-ringing hit and Jon Dwyer is a step closer to toting the rock.

Naturally the biggest concern is an offensive line which has been left in shambles.  Max Starks has a herniated disk in his neck which requires season ending surgery.  The Steelers haven’t said exactly what their plan is for Sunday night but I have to think they’ll either move Flozell Adams back to his original LT position or insert Jonathan Scott who started there for Sean Kugler’s Buffalo Bills.  Personally, I’d leave the Hotel on the right side because they’ve been generating great push in the running game.

But wait, there’s more!  Chris Kemoeatu has a double whammy knee/ankle sprain which in his own words is “not good.”  Meanwhile, Maurkice Pouncey is battling a bruised tibia.  Mike Tomlin was hoping both would be good to go but it sounds like only Pouncey is expected to play.  If the line can hold it together with scotch tape and Bubble Yum, Ben Roethlisberger and the offense should have plenty of opportunities against a fairly porous defense.

One final note, I don’t usually mention special teams since I like talking about real football players.  However, Patriots kicker Stephen Gostkowski has a bum hip and is done for the year.  They’ve brought in former Bungle Shayne Graham to handle FG duties in his absence.

The Steelers were 6-2 at the mid-way point last year and we were saying, “Who cares how you win or how many injuries you have?   We’re 6-2!”   Then we fell into an epic swoon where we lost five straight games against some of the most pathetic teams in the NFL.  I hate to put too much emphasis on one particular game but I feel this is the tipping point for the entire season.  Win this game and I’ll feel a whole lot better about our chances going forward.  Lose or even have another 4th quarter like the one against the Bengals and the alarm bells will continue to grow louder.

At last!  After 25 years, the Pittsburgh Steelers finally had one for the thumb.

And they did it the hard way.

Things started badly as both Duce and Bus were hurt in the preseason.  That meant starting RB duties fell to a 2nd year undrafted free agent by the name of Willie Parker.  Fast Willie introduced himself by rushing for 161 yards in his first game.  He added 111 more in his second.  The heir apparent to Bettis was finally found.

Still, the team struggled.  Big Ben battled injuries necessitating two starts from his backup, Tommy Maddox.   The team lost both games with Maddox playing terribly.  An overtime loss against Jacksonville saw him throw two interceptions during regulation then fumble a snap in overtime when the team was in game winning FG range.  The defense forced a punt so Maddox took matters into his own hands by throwing his third INT, a Pick Six which ended the game.

Steeler fans dumped garbage on his lawn and taunted his two young children after that game in what was the only time I was ever embarrassed to be a member of Steeler Nation.

As of week 13, the Steelers were 7-5 and on the outside looking in at the playoffs.  The team then reeled off four straight wins beginning with a defeat of the Bears where Jerome Bettis clobbered supposed All-Pro LB Brian Urlacher. They finished the season 11-5 which was only good for the sixth seed.

I’m sure we all know what happened next.  Kimo von Oelhoffen went Kobra Kai on Carson Palmer, sweeping the leg and tearing his ACL.   The Steelers beat the #3 seed Bengals to move on to the #1 seeded Colts.  They thoroughly outplayed Indy but only Big Ben making The Tackle on Bus’s monumentally ill-timed fumble kept Indy from taking the lead.  Karma balanced things out when Indy’s kicker missed the game tying FG.   The Steelers then traveled out to Denver and knocked off the #2 seeded Broncos.

In Super Bowl XL, Pittsburgh faced the NFC’s #1 seed, the Seattle Seahawks.  The signature play was provided on FWP’s 75 yard TD run early in the second half.  However, MVP honors fell to Hines Ward, who caught 5 passes for 123 yards and a TD thrown by the best QB on the field that day, WR Antwaan Randle El.  After fourteen long years, Bill Cowher finally won the big one.

Jerome Bettis announced his retirement following the game, a fitting conclusion to the career of one of the all-time greatest Steelers.

2006

The year got off to a bad start when Ben Roethlisberger was sideswiped by some nearsighted old bat while riding his motorcycle.   Ben suffered life threatening injuries because he was too stupid to wear a helmet.  His entire face had to be reconstructed with screws and Elmer’s Glue.    To add insult to injury, a week before the start of the season, he also underwent an emergency appendectomy.

More controversy raged during the preseason when Bettis, in his new role of NBC commentator, mentioned that Cowher told him he wanted to retire after winning the Super Bowl.  Evidently he felt he owed it to his players and the Rooneys to come back and defend the title.   However, he was burnt out from 15 years of coaching and with a new deal not on the horizon, it became more and more apparent this was his swan song with the Steelers.

The team won their first game with Charlie Batch filling in capably.  Then they rushed Ben back for a Monday nighter in Jacksonville.   Ben looked horrible and despite a superior defensive effort the team lost 9-0.  Between the appendix operation and brain damage from the motorcycle accident, Ben was a shadow of himself most of the season.  They also lost to a Raiders team which would only win two lousy games that year.  At 2-6 at the mid-season point, hopes for a Super Bowl repeat were gone.

Still, the team rallied like champions and went 6-2 down the stretch.  Playing the last few weeks under Cowher’s mantra of “Misery loves company,” they provided a little of that misery to the Bengals in the final game of the season.   Cincy needed to win to make the postseason while the Steelers had no motivation but to send their coach out a winner.  Which they did thanks to a 67 yard TD in OT by Santonio Holmes.

2007

Little known defensive coordinator Mike Tomlin was introduced as the Steelers new head coach.  He immediately established his authority by refusing to let Casey Hampton practice or play until he lost weight.  The veterans may not have liked him but he certainly got their attention.  After the team faded badly down the stretch, some players grumbled it was a result of such a tough training camp.

Boo hoo.

The defense lost a ton of swagger when Joey Porter was released during the preseason.  Peezy was a controversial and colorful character but he was also a ferocious linebacker in the true Steeler tradition.  Of course his replacement, James Harrison, was no slouch either.  In fact, had Joey not gotten thrown out of a game against Cleveland in pregame warmups, Silverback may have never gotten a chance to show the NFL what he could do.

The team roared out of the gate to a 9-3 record.  Then safety Anthony Smith issued his infamous “guarantee” that they’d beat the Patriots.  Tom Brady responded by torturing him for two long TD passes then talking trash.   Smith got burned the next week as his big mouth wrote checks his meager abilities couldn’t cash and the team quickly lost two straight.

Things went further downhill when DE Aaron Smith was lost for the season.  When he went down, the Steelers run defense went right along with him.   Meanwhile, FWP broke his leg in the second to last game of the year.   Parker was leading the NFL in rushing at the time and losing him pretty much wrecked our offense.

The team was one-and-done against Jacksonville.   They fell behind early but mounted a comeback which was repeatedly sabotaged by Tomlin’s boneheaded insistence on going for 2 pt conversions.  Still, who knows what would’ve happened if the refs hadn’t missed about four holding penalties on David Garrard‘s first down scramble that set Jacksonville up to kick the winning FG.   The NFL director of officials apologized for the botch job after the game.   But I thought the calls always went the Steelers way?

2008

Since we’re only one year removed, I’ll spare you a detailed recap.  Suffice it to say, this year featured one of the best single season defensive efforts in history.  Dick LeBeau and his men were either first or second in every major defensive category.  Time and time again, Blitzburgh would create a big turnover or stop the opposition cold in their tracks.  Combined with clutch last-second heroics from Big Ben, the season was about as exciting as any you’ll ever see.

Unfortunately, one very important member of Steeler Nation wasn’t here to see it.  The year began on a sad note when the great Myron Cope passed away.  The man who invented the Terrible Towel was surely looking down with an emphatic “YOI!  DOUBLE YOI!” as the Steelers tore through the hardest schedule given any team in the past 30 years.

In the playoffs, the Steelers faced the Ratbirds for a third time.  Three wins against our most hated enemy is nice enough but doing so for the right to play in the Super Bowl made it all the sweeter.   In the big game, the Steelers faced the man who was their offensive coordinator in Super Bowl XL.   Ken Whisenhunt and his Arizona Cardinals were a surprise entrant but they were a worthy opponent.  The two teams played what is widely regarded as the most exciting Super Bowl ever.  Only a last minute toe-dragging catch by MVP Santonio Holmes ensured that the season end on a high note.  Get it, HIGH note?

2009

Which brings us to this year.  Of course, no post Super Bowl off-season is complete without some Ben Roethlisberger drama.   This time, it came in the form of a rape accusation by a cowboy hat wearing desk clerk out in Reno.

To further incur the Football Gods wrath, the folks at EA Sports put Troy Polamalu on the cover of their video game.  The Madden Curse struck immediately as Troy was injured in the Steelers very first game.  He came back briefly but this season has been a total write-off as far as he’s concerned.

Still, this squad got off to an excellent 6-2 start.  Then the wheels fell off.  Losses to three of the worst teams in the league mixed with a sweep by the Bengals.  Ben was concussed in an OT loss to KC.   Hines Ward went on national tv and called his QB a sissy.  Tomlin issued threats and ultimatums which his team ignored.  The defense couldn’t hold a lead while the offense repeatedly failed in the red zone.  Ryan Clark accused the 400,000 fans who came to cheer him on just 10 months earlier of being “fairweather.”   Losses mounted until the streak reached five straight.  Only a slight rebound toward the end of the year has kept the team’s slim playoff hopes alive.

It’s looking like the decade will end much like it began.   With the Steelers on the edge of greatness, searching for that missing player or two that will put them back into serious championship contention.

Still, two Super Bowl championships in four years and multiple playoff games made this an exciting time to be a Steeler fan.  Without a doubt this was the best decade for the Black and Gold since the 1970′s.   I’m sure we appreciate this team giving us memories we’ll carry for a lifetime.  Here’s looking forward to more yet to come!

]]> http://nicepickcowher.com/2009/12/31/a-steeler-decade-in-review-part-2/feed/ 2 http://nicepickcowher.com/2009/11/27/know-thy-enemy-baltimore-ravens/ http://nicepickcowher.com/2009/11/27/know-thy-enemy-baltimore-ravens/#comments Fri, 27 Nov 2009 18:11:22 +0000 chris http://nicepickcowher.com/?p=1910 After playing the Baltimore Ravens three times last season, including an epic AFC Championship game, it’s safe to say the Pittsburgh Steelers know this enemy quite well.  And if familiarity breeds contempt, these teams must outright hate each other by now.  Pittsburgh sports has a number of great rivalries, including Pitt-WVU who meet later today [...]

Know Thy Enemy: Baltimore Ravens - Nice Pick, Cowher - Nice Pick, Cowher - A Pittsburgh Steelers Fan Site - News, Blogs, Opinion and more.