Santonio Holmes Is Not Into Jennifer Aniston

Luckily for her ’cause by the time he finished knocking one out, she’d be walking funny for a week.

Super Bowl MVP Santonio Holmes made an appearance on Jay Leno’sTonight Show” this past Friday to talk about his post season heroics and show that Mike Tomlin isn’t the only snazzy dresser on the Pittsburgh Steelers. He’s auctioning off the gloves he wore when he made the game winning TD catch with benefits going to Sickle Cell research.  Last I checked the bidding was up to a whopping $15,000 so let’s hope the bidder comes through with a fat check when the time comes, unlike the deadbeats who always stiff me whenever I try to sell my old “Magic The Gathering” cards on Ebay.

Holmes should be applauded for making this appearance at great personal risk.  Everybody knows about the infamous photo of his ginormous wang which was posted around the interwebz last year.  With his run-in with the law this season, I appreciate the fact he’s trying to reestablish himself as a good guy who made a couple dumb mistakes, such as being black while driving past Pittsburgh city cops.

Perhaps his biggest risk was being on the same show as Jennifer Aniston.   The former “Friends” star is Hollywood’s poster child for clingy, needy, high-maintenance women.  She’s been passed from one leading man to another more often than a joint at one of Santonio’s parties.  Holmes is fortunate he escaped before she got ideas about dating a football star.  I guess she was too busy promoting her new movie “He’s Not That Into You,” a chick flick out just in time for Valentine’s Day.

Speaking of which, I’ve been debating what to write about on this St. Valentine’s.  I thought about discussing which Steeler jerseys make the sexiest lingerie (Polamalu and Lambert, easily) or 40 different ways to use a Terrible Towel as a sex toy.  Then I thought, February 14th is for the ladies.  So I’ll let a lady have the floor.  This site receives about 400-700 hits per day so I’m guessing at least a dozen of you are females.  I would like to give you a chance to write about whatever you want…why you agree with Victoria’s Secret that Mike Tomlin is the NFL’s sexiest coach, how you once dumped a guy because he was a Patriots fan, etc.   Whatever you’d like.  Just send me an email or leave a message in the comments letting me know you’re interested in being NPC’s first guest blogger.

In the meantime, please remember that a bowling ball is an excellent Valentine’s Day gift and even if you don’t like it, there’s no reason to roll it at your boyfriend.  After all, the Bus loves to bowl so it must be cool.

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Tags: Female Advice Female Nfl Fans Friends He's Not That Into You Jack Lambert Jay Leno Jen And Brad Jen Anistion Jennifer Anistion Jerome Bettis John Holmes Mike Tomlin Mike Tomlin Is Sexy Nfl Lingerie Nfl Valentine's Day Pittsburgh Pittsburgh Steelers Relationship Advice Santonio Holmes Santonio's Huge Wang Sexiest Nfl Coach Sexy Nfl Fans Sexy Steeler Fans Steeler Nation Steelers Super Bowl XLIII Terrible Towel The Bus Tonight Show Troy Polamalu Valentine's Day Victoria's Secret

  • Andrew M

    Good stuff. Yeah Holmes and that telescope in his pants were taking a big gamble going on national TV. Seems like he’s lucked out. You cant be too hard on the SB MVP.

    Good site dude keep it up

  • SandraNY

    Who wrote this JUNK!  The author of this article is absolutely insane!

  • http://nicepickcowher.com/ Chris

    Thanks, Andrew.  I’m sure being there on behalf of charity made sure that Leno was on his best behavior.

    Sorry if I insulted one of your idols, Sandra.  I hate to break it to you but the Enquirer, People, and US Weekly are all wrong.  Nobody cares about Jennifer Aniston anymore except bored housewives who watch Ellen and Oprah all day.

  • Blagere

    Then why are you writing about her? She’s a lot more popular than this pathetic column…..look at all the comments! loser.

  • http://nicepickcowher.com/ Chris

    I see one comment.  And I wrote about her because she’s in the same video as Santonio Holmes.  If she wasn’t, believe me I wouldn’t give her another thought.

    PS:  This is a football blog.  If all you care about is what hot guy Jen Jen is going to get dumped by next or how the Lohan is wearing her hair these days, please go to  http://www.perezhilton.com

  • Robyn

    I was wondering how long it would be before the trolls would arrive…

    anyway, i’d LOVE to be a guest blogger!  I’m having a hard time coming up with a topic though.  my first thought was “jersey chasers and the jerseys they chase” or “why jeff reed gets more ass than a kennywood toilet seat”

  • SteelersFan

    It’s a football blog with stupid sh*t about hollywood celebrities and the size of someone’s schlong? Okay. Makes sense to me!

  • http://nicepickcowher.com/ Chris

    Yes but the stupid shit about Hollywood celebrities and the jokes about penis size are all related to the Pittsburgh Steelers in some way.  That’s how I roll.  I guess I could do something boring and just cut & paste the news stories from Yahoo but I like to be a bit more interesting than that.

    And Robyn, I think both those topics are WINNERS.  Especially the Skippy Reed one.  I think a lot of guys would like to know what women see in that dude…

  • Gordon

    hi could u pls speak to the producers & directors of friends & start it over again, i still enjoy watching the old episodes, & would love it if the series could continue, ur an amzing actress

  • http://vip-progon.ru/ Online

    Пинайте своего хостера – сайт с трудом открылся :(